Myths and Merits

Such a man's situation is identical to that of a young teenager complaining about having to wear a jacket and tie for the first time: he concentrates solely on the negative because he is oblivious to the positives.  Inevitably, once the lad has seen himself in the mirror and has been the recipient of flattering compliments he takes an entirely different view of dressing up.  As any woman will confirm, grown men can be all too similar to little boys so here then is some encouragement to move beyond the childish objections and get in front of that mirror.  Ultimately, there is no better argument for the wearing of black tie than to actually wear it. Like the Detroit Free Press once stated: "Nothing is cleaner, more classic, and more timeless than a well-tailored black tuxedo. Slip one on and you're a star -- at least for the night."

• Formalwear Myths

Myth: Tuxedos are uncomfortable. 

The days of stiff shirts and starched collars are long gone.  Unless your attire was made before 1940, it will be every bit as comfortable as a good suit. After all, a bow tie is not tied any tighter than a four-in-hand and a cummerbund is no more binding than a belt.  

Myth: Formalwear is too much work. 

First off, let’s acknowledge that the excuse regarding extra “work” is really about extra time: no one is claiming that attaching cufflinks instead of buttons qualifies as strenuous manual labor.  Secondly, while it is true that dressing up in formalwear takes more time than putting on in a suit and tie, the minimal difference hardly qualifies as “too much”.  And the effort gap only diminishes with each outing: even tying a bow tie soon becomes no more time-consuming than knotting a four-in-hand. 

More importantly, the additional effort actually plays a beneficial role in making an evening special.  Consider two scenarios involving a night out at the theatre.  In the first, a man comes home from work on the night of the show and throws on any old shirt, trousers and coat along with pair of scuffed shoes.  In the second, the man takes the time in advance to have his jacket pressed and his footwear shined and pairs them with a crisp shirt and smart tie.  The first approach is certainly effortless but does nothing to distinguish the evening from any other function.  The second approach, meanwhile, creates a sense of anticipation before the man even leaves home.  Instead of being a passive participant he is playing an active role in creating a sense of occasion. 

The ritual of dressing up in black tie elevates this anticipation to the level of the sublime.  The satisfying feel of the onyx studs slipping smoothly through the slots in the luxurious cotton, the familiar insertion of the leather suspender tabs, the tying of the patent leather shoes and the skillful knotting of the silk bow tie all build to the denouement when the soft worsted jacket is slipped into place.   Accompany this sensual process with a glass of good Scotch and by the time a man tops everything off with the placing of the silk pocket square he’s likely to find himself with an unexplained craving for a cigarette.    That’s what wearing a good tuxedo is like.  Every time.

A man would do well to question why he feels this experience is good enough for everyone else yet admits that he himself is not worth the extra effort.

Myth: Tuxedos make me look like a waiter. 

A cheap, poorly fitting tuxedo will indeed make you look like hired help.  A well-tailored, smartly coordinated dinner jacket will make you look like landed gentry.

Myth: It doesn’t matter what I wear. 

This myth is an outright lie.  There is a very good reason that black tie affairs are usually associated with milestone events such as the opening of a major theatrical production or the presentation of achievement awards:  the formal dress code invites attire that aptly reflects the uniqueness and distinction of the occasion.   Therefore what a person decides to wear to a "black tie optional" event, opening night or formal cruise dinner cannot be viewed solely as a personal choice of wardrobe but as a contribution to the evening itself. 

Consequently, a man has two options when attending to a tuxedo-optional event: he can either wear a suit and subsequently lower the occasion’s standards or he can opt for formalwear and raise the bar.  There is no middle ground.  

It is inarguable that the more that people rely on other guests to bring a sense of formality to a special occasion, the less formality there will be for everyone.  Luckily the reverse is also true.  Unfortunately, many men – formalwear novices and aficionados alike – likely underestimate the ripple effect caused by a decision to take the high road.  Sure, including one more tuxedo in the crowd will not be statistically significant in a function of 500 people.  But in the context of a table of ten, adding a single smart looking dinner jacket to the mix could indeed have significant impact.  It could mean the difference between one’s tablemates being left with the perception that “hardly anyone wears tuxedos anymore” or realizing that “I forgot how good a tuxedo can make a man look!”  When these diners describe the event to friends afterwards, these perceptions will impact many other men’s decisions on how to dress for their next formal affair.

Myth: Tuxedos look old-fashioned. 

Only the uninformed would confuse “old-fashioned” with “classic”.  Old-fashioned describes something that was a product of its time.  Classic implies something that transcends time.  (Just think of William Shakespeare, Mozart, art deco or jazz.)